Finals

School I will miss you for the next month. I learned so much, I wish I could keep going.

Stick to the Plan

By the end of tonight, I'm going to have written 15 pages for two papers in three days. I'm still a bit stressed but not as much as last night. I wouldn't be surprised if I get stressed again later though.

My step dad is having a bunch of his friends over tonight for the boxing match, but I plan on going on a bike ride to distress myself from essentially everything. Maybe get some ice cream or something, I don't know. It's a bit crazy that I've only left the inside of my house to cuddle with my pups and then just gone back in for the last three days straight. If everything continues to plan, tomorrow is an all rest day with me not doing any homework, mixed in with bike riding and going to see David's ska band play in the night.

This river is running violence
A way to catch our breath
Rising from the mercury
We will climb to bestow our trust
Take away the anchor
Amplify the mystery
Inhale the earth and wind
Map out the plans to our test

So Close

I'm stuck halfway through the 9th page. Just reaching the 10 page is enough for me to call it done.

I'll get this out of the way now, rather than later. I'm stressed as fuck. Good thing I'm on my very last page of this paper because I'm really beginning to hate myself. Right now all I want is a hug and a high five. I hate myself right now. Well it didn't last long for that feeling to kick it.

GAH

My life now revolves around this song for the next week, and if it's not "Blood and Thunder," it's "Deathbound.

Just For A Second

Am I stressed? More or less, but I think it has to do more with there not being a proper way to destress, even for a moment. There is no one to interact with face to face. No one to call my name and distract me, even if it is for a moment. And no one to give me a smile in person, even if it's for a second. I've sat in my room, home alone, for the past 8 hours. My eyes hurt and so does my head, but I'm still not going to stop writing my papers. 21 pages of papers will be turned in on Wednesday. I can do this and that's all I need to know

Tonight, I am Ahab. I will not finish until my work for tonight is done.

Moon Childe

"And there was given to him a mouth
Speaking great things and blasphemies
And power was given unto him
To blaspheme against God
And them that dwell in heaven
And it was given unto him to make war with the saints
And to overcome them..."

-Revelations 13:5-7

Scholarly Research

I love it.

Verbal Donations

Yesterday when a man looking for donations asked me why I was so fortunate of a person, I said "because of Satan" (I'm not sure if wearing my pentagram shirt helped my case). The look on his face and his response, "Well may God help you and Satan take that away" was great. He didn't know he collaborated with more material for my Satanism paper. Thank you sir.

Soccer

I'm just straight out mad right now. It has become incredibly painful to watch Chivas games this season. They've been pathetic, disappointing and just fucking embarrassing. Here I am, every weekend, sitting with my jersey and watching their games religiously. I glue myself to the tv for two hours every weekend since July to catch their games. When they win, it's exciting and exhilarating. When they lose, it's frustrating. But today was a bit different. Things could go into 3 different directions: they could win and play well, lose and play well or lose and play horribly. Without much surprise, choice three took its fate. The reason why this outcome particularly annoys me is that today they qualified for "Liguilla" (aka playoffs) and while usually that makes me happy, because then there exists the aspiration for winning a league title, this time it just means I have to watch at least two more games that are the equivalent of nails on a chalkboard. Hopefully this feeling just goes away in another hour or two until Thursday comes and once again I find myself watching yet another one of their games.