It's funny how somethings have so much sentimental value, but can change by the perception of a person. The material object I talk about is my bicycle. Two years ago, the idea of carrying, riding and investing so much time and love into a bicycle would have never crossed my mind. Today, I find myself so immersed within the bicycle culture that it has become essentially difficult to picture myself outside of it. I ride around in a green Peugeot road bike, use a messenger bag and always make sure I leave my house with my lock and helmet in tow. I find pride in walking up and down stairs with my bike on my back and just ignore all the stares people give me while blasting my iPod a full volume. I have a bicycle playlist that is comprised of the most adrenaline pumping songs in my entire collection. As great as it is to ride a bike, everyone treats it like I've got mental problems. "Aren't you scared to ride in the street with cars?" "No." "Are you sure, because it's really dangerous." I know the risks I place on my life to ride around but I leave that to sit in the back of my mind. The only way I'm going to stop riding is if I get a leg amputated. But the reason I'm writing this is because I miss my bike. Ever since I was hit by a car back in April I have not ridden one single bicycle. My rear wheel is going to be completed soon but I'm hoping sooner rather than later because the streets are calling my name...and they're pronouncing it wrong!
Seeing a friend deal with pain also brings pain to those who are close. A break-up is no easy cure but it is also not impossible. There is nothing that is more important than those who surround a friend in their time of need. I was fortunate of having some of the coolest, badass and hilarious friends at my own side and I know my friend will too. Laughter is a much stronger cure than people. Just ask Smackie the Frog. If you read this, just know we are all here for you.
I love going to concerts and seeing awesome metal bands tear it up (like DevilDriver, who are the best). Well I have an ongoing 7 year wait to see Norma Jean perform live. I'm going to cross my fingers that 2013 will finally be the year that I get to see them. The same also goes for Mastodon. Been listening to them for seven years strong and don't plan on stopping anytime soon.
Yesterday was the start of a new Mexican soccer season. As usual, my best friend Gio and I are playing Liga Fantastica (Fantasy Soccer) on mediotiempo.com as we have been for years. Gio has never beaten me so I plan on continuing this streak. Anyways, yesterday saw Jaguares vs Tigres and the game was depressing to say the least. Tigres played well and won 4-0 but Jaguares just didn't exist. They couldn't defend, attack or shoot. Pretty embarrassing to watch. Tijuana vs Puebla saw Tijuana win by a more narrow 2-0 but with comfortable play. Today has two games that seem to be interesting: Monterrey vs America and Morelia vs Cruz Azul. I'm hoping both America and Morelia lose. The games were too close to bet on in Liga Fantastica so I only got Pavone from Cruz Azul. We'll see what the final result is.
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Friday, July 20, 2012
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Little Things
What’s up with people going out everywhere in revealing
workout clothes? I don’t want to judge or make presumptions (but also, who am I
to have an opinion that will change people’s minds), but track suites and
workout clothing is only appropriate at home and at the gym. Lets get serious
here. When I flew from L.A.X. to Mexico City, there was a lady dressed in
skintight Adidas sports wear. Maybe it’s just me, but it has really irritated
me to see society shift more towards sexual dressing in recent years. I
constantly encounter people at the grocery store with just shorts and a sports
bra on. They do it for the attention and they get it. Some days I find my own
mentality a blessing, but others it’s a curse. So many things in mainstream
society annoy me. I guess I’ll just put on my headphones and “keep on keeping
on.”
I got a new nickname last week, Pedro el Pajaro. The story
behind this is pretty funny (I think so). My uncle comes up to me and asks
“what is PeterBird?” I have to explain to him that the company name is actually
“Peterbilt” and a play off the word “built.” In Spanish, Peter is translated as
Pedro, so hence, Pedro el Pajaro.
I got to watch the second half of the Spain vs Italy game
and man did Italy get outplayed. Spain did exactly what they do best, which is
pass, pass and pass some more. The reason why they play so well is because they
use five midfielders and no forwards. Plus their right and left backs also play
well up the wings, which is why Alba was able to score his goal. The 4-0 was
well deserved.
So I’ve been watching a lot of ESPN Deportes and Discovery
Channel en Espanol over the last few days because there is nothing else better
on tv than my two favorite channels. I’d rather watch a novela than watch an
Mtv reality show. Anyways, I was watching Dog Whisperer dubbed in Spanish and
oh god is it hilariously horrible. My favorite parts are when the dub actors
try to imitate the little voices that Cesar Milan does as well as the owners of
the dogs. They even imitated the part where one of the owners began crying
midway though his interview. It was so bad it was hard to not laugh. River
Monsters is also pretty weird in Spanish. Discovery Channel needs to hire better
dub actors, but then again if they change them, I won’t stick around to watch
the bad dubbing.
Inverted Crosses
“Are you mad or just insane?” – King Diamond (“Twilight Symphony”)
I spend too much time alone in Mexico. This happens every
time I come to Mexico and it is essentially inevitable. Everyone works and I
just stay at my grandma’s house all day watching ESPN hoping something
interesting will happen over the transgression of the day. During this time, I
also just have my labtop open blasting music. The great thing though is that
metal isn’t necessarily songs about rainbows and flowers, just random things,
from non-fiction to science fiction.
While alone time is good, it has lead to a lot of dark
thoughts over the last few days, both good and bad. I would like to point out
that these dark thoughts are nothing new, but they happen a lot more often and
darker than my usual ones. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about putting
inverted crosses and pentagrams on a lot of my things. Backpacks, jeans, shoes,
as tattoos, etc. I wouldn’t wear it as a form of anti-religion, but more for
shock value. I think it inverted crosses are fucking out of this world. I
wouldn’t hesitate to put an inverted cross on my backpack and walk around with
it for kicks.
I’ve also been thinking of how awesome my nails were when I
painted them black and would do it again any day, but I still live at home and
yeah.
Chimaira. I love this band and pretty happy I had the
opportunity to see them almost three years ago. I’ve been listening to them a
lot lately. I’m not sure if it’s because of the dark and personal lyrics, or
because the guitars as extremely catchy. I get a lot of the adrenaline rush
when I listen to their songs.
I’ve also been listening to a lot of Mercyful Fate. Dark
themes galore. Even though I don’t like their album 9, I want to get the shirt
with the album cover on it because it looks satanicy (is that even a word) just
like I want to get the Don’t Break The Oath shirt too. (I also want to get the
Them King Diamond shirt.)
I don’t know, but I need to maintain myself occupied and my
mind busy instead of leaving it so much in the dark (no pun intended). Sorry
for using the word “also” so much. It sorta just came out like that, but then
again it is 12:30 am so maybe my mind is just putting out whatever it feels
like.
Politics
It is currently 10:57 pm and it’s almost a full 24 hours
since the new Mexican President, Enrique Penaneto, was voted by the people to
lead the country for the next six years. Penaneto, the Pri candidate (Mexico’s
version of the Republicans) destroyed the candidate of the Pan party (Mexico’s
Democratic party), Josefina something something and it caused quite a big
uproar. It was reported that thousands of teens and adolescents took to the
streets and protested the Pri victory at the nation’s capital. Call me biased,
but it does appear that the Pri is not a very liked party around here, just
like the Republicans are in the U.S.
In the United States, politics seem to be the center of
everything. I used to be a Democrat but switched to independent. I believe in
free education, free health care, immigration reform and higher taxes, but I
also believe in correct military spending. What’s the point of pouring in
billions of dollars into the wars when our own street corners and streets are
not safe. Republicans are portrayed as douche bags and democrats as the world’s
saviors. The only reason why Ronald Regan’s’ economic policies failed in the
80s was because the country wasn’t prospering as much as the government thought
it was. If Bill Clinton would have imposed the same tax cuts in the 90s, no one
would have given a single shit because the country was prospering very well. To
give tax cuts on the higher up now would easily be the wrong thing to do.
I never understood until recently why so many members of
metal bands were Republican. Bands live off of what they make on tour and many
times are living off of a five dollar a day budget. To tell someone who lives
off of almost nothing that they have to pay extra in taxes to help others with
social programs, is inevitably the incorrect thing to do. Now, I’m not saying
that social programs are the problem or that raising taxes is the solution to
the country’s economic problems. What I am trying to say though, is that
citizens of the United States need to begin to understand each other. When 40%
of the entire country’s wealth is owned by 1%, you know there are cracks in the
system.
In Mexico, my family is pro-Pan and in the United States,
they’re pro-Democrat.
I know, who am I to give my political opinion, but watching
the Mexican elections unravel got me ranting in my head.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Grandma´s Birthday
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| Grandma and I |
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| All my cousins, grandma and uncle Joel |
On
Saturday June 23, 2012, my grandma turned 73. It was a day for as much
celebration as it was tears. My grandma is pretty damn old and her age is
slowly catching up to her. There is no one out there like her. She’s always
supported my two cousins, Mario and Edson, and myself. Between all four of us
there is a very special bond. When I was born, my grandparents both went to
visit me in LA and bought a tv which still sits today in the living room of my
grandma’s house and works without a problem. “That thing is as old as you,” she
always tells me.
My
grandma has always housed me when I visit Mexico and it is exactly where I am
now writing this blog post on Microsoft that I will save on a flash drive and
take to a cyber café once the sun rises in about four hours. This three-story
house has a lot of history. Both good and bad, but that’s a story for another
time. But the house, it represents a good part of me. As kids, Edson and I used
to play soccer on the roof/third floor while my grandma put the clothes out to
dry. On the second floor my uncle Ivan, cousins Mario, Edson, Diego and I used
to all get together and play Mario Kart 64 together. There is also a bathroom
on the second floor with an electrical plug that I used to shock myself with
when I got bored. And on the first floor is the living room where the entire
family would always get together and the kitchen where we would all sit at eat
grandma’s delicious food.
These
days that I long for sometimes are all gone and disappeared years ago. Everyone
has grown up and gotten married. For god’s sake, in February my grandma turned
into a great grandma.
But
back to my grandma. I find her very special. Strong woman. My grandpa died about
eighteen years ago and yet my grandma has still been able to pay for her bills
without a problem. She provided a home for my aunt and two cousins when they
had nothing and paid for their k-12 education. Like I said earlier, her age is
catching up to her, so between the entire family essentially now we take care
of her. I love spending time with my grandma, but like everyone else in the
family, fear the day when she doesn’t wake up.
As
an atheist, it would be a bit weird if I said “I hope God takes care of her in
heaven” but I’m not and I actually do hope that when the day comes when she no
longer sees the light of day and hears the sounds of roosters waking the whole
block up, that the ground take good care of her bones. I hope I’ll be there to
say at least one last goodbye but who knows. When my grandmother on my father’s
side of the family died in March of 2004, I was not able to go to the funeral
in Mexico, but watching the pain that my father went through in the process of
the days before her death was hard enough. Nothing was more gut wrenching than
the day she could no longer recognize his voice. My dad spent twenty years
acting like a father to all my aunts and uncles alongside my grandma and for
her to just be able to identify him hurt even me.
The
moral of these stories always ends with “love a person while they’re still
living because there is nothing you can do when they’re dead.” But that’s not
the moral of my story here, mine is to enjoy my own life surrounded by the
people I love while I’m alive. I constantly place my own life at risk. I’m a
cyclist to say the least and to not recognize that would be pretty stupid on my
behalf. I got hit once already and there is nothing that can’t say I might get
hit again soon and lose a limb or my life. I sit on ledges with 100 feet
between myself and the ground just for a pretty picture. One little thing can
easily go wrong and there I go. When I die, I want people to look at my
pictures and go, “well, looks like he did have a lot of fun at that show with America,
Irving, Kim and Gio.” I smile a lot and give other loads of smiles. Enjoy then
while they’re still around because you never know when I’ll smile for one last
time.
Anyways,
it’s 2:30 am. I need my sleep even though I’m not even sure what we’re doing
today. Til next time blog.
Mosquitos
My
entire body is covered in mosquito bites it’s just mother fucking ridiculous.
As you can see in the pictures, we’re not talking about five or ten, it’s low
triple digits. I have forty from my thigh to my knee on my right leg. I have so
many on my left arm, I decided to connect the dots for fun but too bad it isn’t
pictured too well. Damn you dark skin. I wish I would show you the mosquito
bites on my hands. The back of my palms have about seven or eight each and each
finger had at least two with some even having five. I want to just scratch them
but with my mind control I’ve been preventing myself. Some have begun to go
away but others look like they’ll still be around for another week or two,
especially the ones on my feet. The pain is just GAH. Maybe by the time I have
another opportunity to post something they’ll be gone. But for now, the pain is
unbearable. It’s about to be 2 a.m. and I need to get some rest. Good night
everyone.
Black Sheep
Visiting
Mexico is always a great feeling. There is no feeling in the world that matches
hanging out with all my uncles and cousins: laughter and humiliation. Just
because I’m vacationing in Mexico and visiting everyone doesn’t mean I’m not reminded
of my inability to speak Spanish on the level of everyone else. I am one of
three people (the other two are my cousins Justin and Brandon) in the entire
family that have Spanish as their second language. My control of the rules and
verbs, adjectives as well as tenses and the labeling of male and female are all
pretty shitty to say the least. My cousins still bug me about saying “la bano”
instead of “el bano,” “Polandia” instead of “Polonia,” and “sambutar” instead
of “sambutir.”
Due
to my long hair, my uncle Robert calls me “Jesus Christ” every five minutes. My
uncle Joel calls me “mosh” and my cousin Edson calls me “Pepe Nacho.” But my
cousin has been changing my nickname constantly so by now I’ve los track. All
my uncle Oscar does is joke about cutting all my hair and asking “what would
you do if I cut it all off while you were sleeping?”
The
entire family is sarcastic to say the least and insanely hilarious but after a
while I feel like I’m about to give in and go off on everyone. No one in the entire
family is as big of a joke punching bag than I am. I get shit for my hair,
clothes, music. I get made fun of for what I say and what I don’t say. The big
joke that all my uncles always bring out on me is the “misma playa” joke from
about ten years ago. What happened was that I complained that we always visited
the same beach (hence “misma playa”) because my grandma didn’t want anyone to
risk getting hurt. 100% logical, but the problem was that the water at the
beach for a good 20 feet is only about ankle high. I complained with my
obviously not well developed Spanish and said “siempre misma playa.” Now, after
so many years, it is still the heart of all jokes. I got tired of it many years
ago but can’t really do much, just got to suck it in and take every punch.
There is still a long road left to take before the joke disappears, until then,
one step at a time.
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Average
Being myself has its positives, negatives and purgatories. I attempt to be as likable as a person as I can within the boundaries of who I am. I wear a smile on my face everyday because that is exactly what makes me well...me. I have a tendency to make people laugh as it's just part of who I am. Some days I have my hair all down, others in a pony tail and when not taking myself seriously, in a bun. I wear black all day everyday. 3/4ths of my shirts are not family friendly. I drink water out of a fossett and love to eat peanut butter. If I could, I would have sleeve tattoos on both arms and wear my pentagram Arch Enemy shirt that reads "Pure Fucking Metal" on the back. But at the same time, I'm a family person, or at least I attempt to be. I hang out with my mom. I try to only wear my more gruesome clothing when going to school and to concerts. I get along really well with other people's parents. I respect others' religion and have a calendar with kittens on it. On the purgatory level, friends are some of the worst and easiest to find, let alone to keep. But my best friends are the most random set of awesome people I've ever known in my life and I plan on keeping every single one until they day I die. Relationships...haha what is there to say but I'm too metal for others I guess. They don't like black and they don't like long hair, well fucking sucks to be you huh. I'll keep looking, someone has to exist. (back to friends/other people) People either like me or they don't. I don't conform to anything and don't dress to please anyone. I don't expect people to find my manner of dress acceptable anyways. My influences come from various phases both past and present. Cargo pants from my youth. Black clothes from metal. Bright clothes from my love of the color green. Soccer jerseys. A messanger bag from cycling as well as rolling up the right side of my pants. If there is one thing I'm not asking for, it's acceptance. I don't want to be another cog in the machine that is society. I just want to people to understand one thing, I'm Jaziel, I listen to fucking heavy metal and if my shirt offends you, well that's your problems. I'm not average and I never plan on being it. Have a nice day.
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Europe: A League of It's Own
I currently find myself in the Czech Republic. Prague to be exact. Beautiful city. Anyways, I feel like I'm losing my mind out here in Europe. My uncle and I are here for a total of 10 days, it's been 6 already, and it appears we're more of a sight seeing bus, than actual tourists. As much as the sights are beautiful and the difference of the city feeling between the United States and all of Europe, I'm slowly beginning to dislike this trip. My uncle makes us travel 20 minutes to get off the train, take like 3 pictures and off we go to our next destination. We're not even really enjoying these places at all. Or at least I'm not.
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| The beautiful architecture of Budapest. Can I live here? |
I don't know, but at the end of the day, I feel like I'm stressing myself out because this trip is not going as my own mind had it planned. I'm probably just going to sit back and let this trip plan out its own fate. If the two pictures and moving on continues, well then so be it. I'm still enjoying the sights so why complain.
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| It's a castle...seriously. |
I'm just using this to set my mind free. Maybe this was all an effect from sitting in a train cart at 2 in the morning, filled in a little slot where five other people slept and using my iPod listening to The Number Twelve Looks Like You and Panda. Until next time, have a good day everyone. I should sleep now, it's almost 2:30 am.
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